Dear Lottie Bella: 20 months old

Dear Lottie Bella

Since my last letter to you, you have experienced the biggest change to your little life to date, and I could not be more proud of how well you have dealt with it. Just under a month ago you became a big sister and your home and family were turned upside down by your new baby sister, Frankie.

When I went into labour, you went to your auntie, uncle and big cousin’s house. Not a huge event for lots of children but it was actually the first time you’d spent more than a few hours without me. I was desperate to get home that night so that you could come home too, as I was worried you would be upset without us. It wasn’t to be and I had to stay in hospital and so you had a sleepover there. I shouldn’t have worried at all though as you took it all in your stride and behaved beautifully. The only time you had a slight meltdown was if you were left with your uncle on your own. You’re a funny little thing as you love him and are absolutely fine if there are other people around.

Anyway when you came home the next day and met Frankie, you were so sweet, peeping not her Moses basket and saying ‘oooo’ over and over again. You had a little cry when I was feeding her and you realised you couldn’t get to me, but other than that, you were as good as gold.

A month in, and you and Frankie have a slow blossoming relationship. You are very interested in her, you go to see if she’s in her cot every morning when you get up, and you watch her, every move when she is awake, but so far most of your interaction is from afar. You are a little nervous and unsure of her, but you are slowly getting braver and are starting to touch her feet and hair a little bit and you are always waving at her. You think when she is throwing her arms around that she is waving to you and you love it.

You hate it when she cries with her reflux and often get upset too. You sometimes get a bit sad if she is in the sling and you can’t get right in for a cuddle with me, which really upsets me as you are too little to understand, but we are finding ways around those little moments and you are adjusting amazingly well for such a little girl.

The way you have reacted so far shows just what a kind, sweet and calm little girl you are and it makes my heart melt to watch you being such a poppet.  I can’t wait to watch you grow and bloom as a big sister and see your relationship with Frankie grow. She already adores you and watches every move you make and looks for you every time she hears your voice.

Aside from your new sister status, you’ve had another huge leap during the last two months yourself. You are finally properly walking. Hurrah! You took your first steps outside the house the day before Frankie arrived and since then, there’s been no stopping you! I’m so pleased for you as it has really opened up the world for you to enjoy and explore and you are loving it. You’re still really proud of yourself for walking and often toddle over to somebody beaming at them, it’s so cute.

You’ve spent lots of time with daddy while he has been on paternity leave and you have absolutely loved it. You are a proper daddy’s girl and its lovely to see you strengthening your relationship too.

This month you have been loving:

Walking  – your newfound skill is still exciting and you are just too cute when you totter around with your arms in the air.

The park – walking has meant you can also climb and it is your all time favourite thing to do. If we took you to the park twice every day I don’t think you’d get bored. Your latest t I know is going down the slide head first, which puts mamas heart straight into her mouth.

Chips – we’ve had a few pub lunches after the park while daddy has been off and you’ve had some treats and have discovered a love of chips. You always eat your peas first though so I can’t really complain!

The garden – you adore walking up and down the path in our garden. You’d do it until your legs collapsed if you could. When we bring you indoors and close the back door, you cry your eyes out. I think we will have a fun summer playing out there.

Little toys – You were given a basket of plastic food as a gift for being a big sister and you love carrying the little bits of food around with you. You recently slept for your entire afternoon nap with a bunch of grapes in one hand a roast chicken in the other.

Balloons – We’ve had a couple of big birthdays recently and you just adore the helium balloons, you squeal with delight when you can bat them around.

Your bed – You still love your sleep, and have a good nap every afternoon, but you are shattered by bedtime every night and at 7pm, you can usually be found at the bottom of the stairs, ready to go to the land of nod. So cute.

The last two months has really seen you grow up, Lottie, and you are a delight to be around. You take such pleasure in everything you do, and are always laughing, giggling and smiling. I’m so proud of how you have adapted to your new sister. I didn’t think it was possible to love you any more than I do, but my heart grew when I saw you meet Frankie for the first time and watched you interact with her.

As a parent, the most important thing is for your children to be happy, and I hope that you remain the sunny, happy little girl that you are at the moment. Your little grin makes me and everyone around you smile too. I often look at you and wonder how we created someone so perfect and gorgeous, and I could not love you more if I tried. As I type, you have just woken from a nap and I can’t wait to go up and get you for a big cuddle. I’m sure there are many tantrums to come, and we have started to experience them already, but they are short-lived and you’re easily distracted and soon smiling again.

I know you won’t remember this stage of your life in years to come, but I want you to know that despite us having a new baby in our family, my love for you remains just as big and strong as it ever was, if not more so. I will always feel guilty about not having as much time for you now that there is someone else who needs caring for, but I know if will help you to become even sweeter, kinder and more loving than you already were.And know that whenever you need me, I will always, always be here for you with open arms.

All my love

Mama xxx

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