Well we are nearly half way through this pregnancy already and next week we get to see little sunny again for our 20 week scan, which seems a bit surreal as I still haven’t really got my head around the fact we are going to be a family of four in a few months.
This last week though, I have been feeling more pregnant. My body is definitely asking me to slow down a bit. The tiredness is at another level the last few days and I could quite happily go to bed when Lottie does at 7.30pm at the moment. When I wake up after eight hours sleep, I feel as though I haven’t been to bed.
Luckily my headaches have now passed, which is a huge relief. And *touches wood*, I haven’t had any other physical symptoms to speak of this week.
But I have felt this baby wriggling around loads this week. After the first flutters last week, it has really got going and is quite often active first thing in the morning and around dinner time in the evening, which is similar to how its big sister used to be. I love to feel those movements. They are so reassuring and definitely help me to bond with this little unknown person.
This week the decorator was in and now the main rooms in our house are all done, so next is to turn our spare room into a room for Lottie so that she can settle in before the baby arrives. We are planning to do this over Christmas, but I think that getting into planning mode for that has made our new arrival seem all the more real too. And I’m starting to get tentatively excited about meeting this little one.
Emotionally this pregnancy, I am totally different to how I was in my first. All my adult life I’ve been quite a hormonal, and Mr M used to joke with Lottie’s pregnancy, that I should stay pregnant as long as possible as it seemed to really level out my emotions. Well this time, it ain’t so! I am so tearful, and sensitive. It’s like permanent PMT. Poor Mr M. I’m hoping it will start to level out again, as crying so much is exhausting.
I also felt really confident with my body in my last pregnancy, but this time I’m feeling a bit dowdy, a bit drab and a bit of a blob. I’m definitely not flaunting it this time and even shopping for maternity clothes saw me coming home with grey, navy and black clothes to blend in a bit. I just can’t seem to find that mojo again. Don’t get me wrong, I’m super proud of my bump itself, but the rest of me is a different story. I think it’s got a lot to do with being so tired and emotional.
I’m just about to head upstairs for a bath and have a bit of me time, and hopefully start to feel a bit more like myself.
See you next week.